And Now We Wait

Last week, everyone submitted their rank lists.  Wednesday was the final day to make any changes to the list.

Amazingly, we only changed our list once.  I made copies of our rough draft and hung it everywhere throughout the house; on the bathroom mirror, the front door, the fridge, and our closet door.  I looked at the thing constantly.  One day I looked at it and told Mav I didn't like the middle of our list.  He didn't either.  We rearranged a couple of spots.

We decided that we wanted our list done a couple of days before the list 'had' to be submitted.  Monday came and we submitted our list.  We checked it and double checked it.  As Mav submitted the list, he said "Well, we've done all we could."

When Mav said that I had two feelings.  One of peace.  Yeah, he has worked so hard the past four years and it is all we could do.  And then the other one, the feeling of my heart sinking to the bottom of my stomach.  Because, really, he could do only so much and there isn't much control in this match process.

So, now, we wait.  17 long, long days to match day.

I told Mav last night that this is the most excruciating wait of my life.  This is worse than the wait to our wedding day or waiting to my due date with Squeaks, (actually my induction day because she was a week late.)  Mav asked why.  "Why!?!  Because I don't know what exactly is going to happen.  Is it going to be a happy, wonderful, exciting day or is it going to be a day that I'm left disappointed and crying.  That's why!"

12 Days & Counting

Thank you to answering my question.  I've heard a lot input from you guys and from friends.  Everyone has different opinions.  I've heard chose the best, chose the best fit for you, chose the location, go with your gut feeling, and lots of other things. 

We're still debating between program X and program Y for our second and third choice.  One day says program X but I change my mind to program Y.  We're just not on the same page.  We need to be on the same page. 

At dinner last night, we were on the same page.  We both decided the better program would be second, grudgingly though.  During pillow talk, Mav asked me if I would be happy at program X.  I choked back the tears and admitted that I would not be happy at program X.  I would be miserable.  I would hate it.  I hated the area when we interviewed there.

Then I told Mav what I think about every night before I fall asleep.  This may be cheesy to you, it was cheesy to Mav.  Every night before I fall asleep I imagine myself running at a barrel race.  It's not just a day-dream-kinda-thing.  I imagine that perfect run.  Where I put my feet, how I hold my reins, when I sit down low in the saddle to make a snappy turn.  I was near tears when I told Mav this.  See.  I miss riding so much.  And really, I don't think I would be happy at program X.  At least, not knowing that we will be making some money and could afford to have one of my horses. 

I told Mav that I feel like I've put my life on hold for four years.  Don't misunderstand me, please.  I love being a mom and a wife.  I chose this after all.  I told Mav that I just don't want to become on of those people who never continued to do what they loved.  I still have my passions and dreams.   

And this is why we are back at the drawing board. 

We have 12 days to make a decision. 

Program X or program Y. 

Rank List

I'm sure lots of you can guess what happens in 15 days.  Any guesses?  Anyone?  

Rank lists are due.

I knew this wasn't going to be easy.  But I didn't anticipate how hard it would be either.  How do you decide when you're torn between two places?

Maybe you guys can help.  Will you listen to our dilemma?  I would really appreciate it if you did.  

Soooo...  Our first choice was easy.  A no-brainer actually.  But two and three, we keep debating on.  We go back and forth every day.  Maybe we should rank program X as two and program Y as three.  And by the way, four through eleven, we know.  It's two and three we can't decide.  This is where you come in.  

Let me tell you about program X.  Mav fell in love with it.  He loved the program.  The people are really cool.  The hospital is practically brand new.  It's not a real huge city.  Low crime rate.  Cheap price of living.  The weather is comparable to St Louis: hot, humid with more snow in the winter.  But it's further east.  Basically, it's an amazing, awesome, incredible program.  But it's further east.  

Now, program Y.  Not nearly as amazing as program X; still good though.  Mav feels like he would still get good training.  Now, this program is closer to home.  As a matter of fact, it's a day's drive.  We would have non-stop visitors.  We could go camping and snowboarding.  I could have my horses and dog.  The weather is warm.  It's cheap price of living.  Did I mention I could have my horses and dog?

Oh.  And I should mention, one of these two programs has a few DO's in each class and the director of the residency is a DO.  Does this matter?  Will it matter later on when Mav is trying to get a real job?  

See how we're struggling on this one.  Do we go with the program Mav loved or go with everything we love?  We are seriously torn.  

Here's my other question.  Does this even matter?  Really.  It's our two and three spot.  They're both high on our list.  Do we just flip a coin and say whatever?  And who knows exactly how the match really works?  What would you do?  How did you handle this?  Were you torn?  

And why, if everything is left up to a computer, do we have to wait until March 15th for match day?  Really?  It's electronic!  It should be faster than a month's wait to know where we're going.  Just saying.

Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween y'all! 

We've been celebrating Halloween all week long.  Last night, it was the barrel racing association's annual costume contest.  I believe Squeaks and my horse looked pretty darn cute.  I made their costumes.  I know, I know.  I'm great. 

And not only did my horse look good, she ran good too.  I finally landed in the pay window.  $42.  It's been a while since I've won money.  But that's the way it goes when you're away from home for almost four years.  With us being home since August (for Mav's away rotations), I've been riding nearly every day.  Riding consistently sure does pay off.  Literally. 

Let the Interview Season Begin

It's really happening.  We are all applied for residency.  And we're already hearing back for interviews. 

Mav has applied to 28 programs.  We have been requested to interview at 12 of them and we're on the waiting list for another.  Not too shabby if I do say so myself.  We've heard back from nearly half of the programs we applied to.  Rumor is from a lot of people in this residency that we'd be lucky to hear from a quarter of them.  I think we're doing good. 

Does anyone else say 'we' when it comes down to this whole medical career thing?  Sometimes I found myself thinking it's really weird that I say 'we.'  I'm not the actual one in medical school you know.  But you know what, I have been with Mav since his second year of undergrad.  This is a 'we' effort for us. 

Back to the residency thing.  I'm super excited.  I'm just curious of y'all.  How many have residencies have you applied to?  Have you heard back from some?  Are you going to travel with your spouse to the interviews?  I wish everyone the best of luck through this year's interviewing season. 

Away Rotations Really Do Take You Away

We've been gone.  We've been gone for a long, long, loooong time now. 

We decided to do two away rotations.  We've heard from a lot of people in Mav's chosen specialty that it's who-you-know in this specialty that will get you noticed, interviews and hopefully, a job.  So two away rotations it was. 

Man.  We've regretted it.  I think with Mav's Step scores and how well he's done in everything, really everything, we probably didn't need to do the two.  One away rotation to the our top pick would have been just fine.  But no.  We decided to heed everyone's advice and do two. 

You guys.  It's sucked!  Well, let me take that back for a second.  The first rotation was great.  Fantastic.  Amazing.  Mav loved it.  He would come home with a skip in his step and would be so excited to tell me about his day.  He loved the first program.  He loved the residents.  He loved the place.  He loved it, to say the least.  And they loved him!

But this second one, it's been something else.  It's the complete opposite from the other away rotation.  Yeah, the residents are nice.  But Mav feels like this place doesn't care about him in the least bit.  They don't seem to care that he's chosen them or even care about the amount of money he's spent to come do a rotation with them.  We're talking nearly a thousand bucks y'all.  He's nearly done with this rotation and no one has presented him with information about the residency or tried to talk it up.  Did I mention the tears that were shed when Squeaks and I dropped him off at the airport?  The second rotation has been aweful.  It's been hard.  It's sucked!

Mav only has nine days left at this horrible place.  Then we'll head back home.  And let me tell you how excited I am for that.  I cannot wait to get back to our normal again.  I cannot wait for Squeaks to get back to a routine!  She hasn't had one since August.  It's taking its toll on me and her. 

And how I wish internet friends, that I could tell you just where Mav is so you too can avoid this horrible place.  But I'm sure you understand that it must all be so discreet until Match Day. 

Fighting Sucks

It has been one crappy week people.

It started with needing to register our car.  We thought it was going to be your typical routine thing.  Well, we were wrong.  We needed to replace a part.  It wasn't a big deal except it took Mav's entire Saturday morning off to do it.  Whatever.  We got it to pass.  That's what counts right?

Saturday night I was expecting him to be home from work around 11:30.  Instead, I got a call from him.  The way he sounded I thought someone had died.  And of course I thought the very worse.  Instead he started cussing that someone had busted his passenger window out.  At least we had already got our car to pass safety and emissions.  What Mav wasn't aware of was we had some serious wind blowing that night.  I think the wind picked something up to shatter his window.  That was something else that needed to be fixed.

Then today, we had a window guy out to fix a crack in my truck's windshield.  Instead of fixing it, it cracked more.  He said he couldn't fix it and wouldn't charge us.  Oh goody.  But now, we're going to need a new windshield.

Next week, we're driving cross country for away rotations. Gas prices are insane! 

We have almost maxed out our credit cards.

He's applying for residencies.  He'll be flying all over the country.  

We're poor. 

All of this equals to one big fight between me and Mav.

And me being up way too late...